Relationship in #Nigeria is like market, buying and selling has become the order of the day.
”LOVE” now come in quality and in quantity, while ”sex” has a prize tag.
Statistics reveal that most people don’t enter into relationships because of true love, but either for ”good sex, money, good looks or connection” etc.
It’s sad to comprehend that unlike our parents only few tend to discover there soul mate, twin flame.
In Nigeria the mindset of the citizens has been negatively influenced which messed up the ingenuity of been a handsome guy which most heart broken ladies tag playboys (fuck boy, man whore, womanizer etc) without knowing the true character of this class of human beings.
The heart broken guys in turn feel every beautiful girl is a #Slay queen (biller, slay mama, olosho, ashawo, bitch etc)..
This mindset is currently crippling the root of true love, companionship and truth amidst relationship.
It’s sad to know that all over the world we have a high rate of divorce, breakup, separation all because nobody is willing to work on there self, to accommodate or endure, to love selfless without motive and be true to each other..
This has made the few faithful ones afraid of what is out there…
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Only if we can discover to recover, then we can find and hold onto what is rightfully ours, there is faithfulness but only few truly practice it.
Being #single isn’t wrong, compared to being in an unhealthy relationship.
Many are frustrated and there love has grown cold, because of a couple of toxic relationship they engaged in.
This situation has stolen joy, peace, encouragement, true love, charitable heart and forgiveness..
Many have subscribe to unfaithfulness because of there ”EX” or past experience, but the problem is not the past, but there lack in forgiving, letting go and moving on to a brighter future …
Many are vengeful, vicious, serpentine tongues, whose hearts and actions are bent on cheating.
Professing love but there heart is overflowing with hatred and covetousness.
When you are single, you are at peace, you are in joy, you might not have a love of partnership but at least you have self love…
But you can find peace and more when you find the right soul that can love you truly for who you are but for now never accept a toxic person, because of loneliness.
Never endure and manage a long term relationship, you could end up getting hurt or hurting the other.
Benefits of Staying Single Before Accepting That Toxic Relationship
1. Peace of Mind
Peace of mind is like pouring water on your head after a sunny day, its like coming home hungry knowing there is food in the pot, its like walking in the dark alley knowing you are being guided and protected.
Peace of mind is a joy bringer, complete happiness and contentment, when you are at peace, you worry less, you won’t have to think about him or her, or wonder what he has done or doing, cheating or not ?
Zero jealously which brings depression and frustration Or being anxious for no reason.
If you worry then it’s just for your parent, kids, siblings or business or anything that concerns your wellbeing, but the troubled mind, of him or her, won’t be among your worries.
When you are in a relationship with a Narcissist man or woman, you can never have peace because your every step will be queried.
The most annoying character flaw in most of this toxic women/ men is nagging, its like a tap that is dripping water drip, drip, nothing can stop there wild tongue.
This had made many men/women run away from there beloved home.
2. Financial Increase
When you are single, you spend less, your #income doubles up that is if you are working hard.
The honest truth is that lazy women are always in need, date nights, movie nights, birthday bash, monthly allowance, lingerie, clothes, bags, hair allowance, nails, etc all this expenses goes to the man especially when you are dating some Nigerian lady.
Been in a relationship with some Nigerian girls automatically makes you her father (zaddy) this will put you on an estimated bill (pay as you go), your spending doubles up because you think more now of the second party.
If you are in a start up stage, this could put you in an automatic speed, that is if you no longer have a conscience…
In recent times many engage in criminal activities mostly because of a girl they loved left them for another guy, some end up being fraudsters (yahoo boy, Yahoo plus), ritualist (pant for benz, releasing maggots inside an opposite sex body through sex, eating Feces — Many ladies have gotten mad, just because some boy stole there destiny to enrich there self) #Cultism, Robbery, kidnapping, Drug trafficking, etc …
When you are dating a sensitive, caring woman you spend less but if you are dating a toxic girl, or a woman that uses charm like (kayamata, jaruma etc ) your finances will suffer a great loss.
Genuine #spirituality, is a broad concept with room for many perspectives.
This includes a sense of connection to something bigger (God, Universe, Spirits) than ourselves, and it typically involves a search for meaning in life.
In Christian belief, Spirituality is a covenant or an agreement of service to God, the creator of all things, God through Jesus Christ grants us a righteous spirit (Holy Spirit) which brings wisdom, revelation, gift of healing, inspired message, faithfulness, speaking in strange tongues, gift of vision and deliverance etc
Sex is a covenant of the ”flesh”, transfer of energy, spirit (clean and unclean) frustration, #depression, motivation, growth, failure, disappointment, backwardness.
The spirit controls the physical, just like contacting stds from a lover, there is also a spiritual sickness
being contacted during sex (Sexually Transmitted Demons).
When both partners merge you can most time see the two partners resembling each other, some even tend to finish each other words, and tend to act in the same manner.
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Sexual immorality is like fire, it starts small but spread uncontrollably, nothing satisfies its craving more than dryness (lack of contentment, lust) it renders everything to dust and ashes (immune, mindset, spirituality).
It smells of burning sulphur (Precum, Sperm, vagina smell) , the only solution is water and detergent (born again , study and practice of the bible and obedient to teachings of Jesus Christ ) which moist and cleanse it raze, the blood of Jesus Christ washes the burning urge of carnality, the ashes and dust turns into snow, that is what salvation does to your soul ..
Many destiny has been hindered because of the man or woman he or she slept with, as STDS is transferred, spirituality sickness is passed too.
But if you are single and celibate, you are sure of your health both physically and spiritually, and if you get sick, you will know the root of your problem and know how to tackle it .
Fornication is weakness of the spirit and lust of the flesh.
4. Focus on Goals, Dreams and Aspiration
A single man or woman is more focused than someone in a un-healthy relationship.
In recent times most failure is accompanied with toxic relationship, because many tend to get over addicted that all there thoughts revolves round there lover, maybe because of the good sex, or maybe because of the gifts or the way the other party makes them feel or basically because they are charmed.
Success demands focus and many men and women has been limited to reach there true potential because they spend more
time, trying to satisfy there flesh and there partner.
The worst scenario is been in a relationship with someone that has no understanding, jealous or controlling.
A lot of people are always seeking attention, they could go to any length just to get your attention, they feel that you ought to give them enough of your time and attention and this can derail your focus on a goal, especially when you are an unmarried youth.
Unhealthy relationships have ruined many dreams, aspirations and goals, because of their toxic partnership, many have stopped working or become unemployed because of a jealous lover, many women have dropped out of school because of an unwanted pregnancy.
Many gullible youths loose focus while in a relationship and many successful ones are mostly single or in a healthy relationship.
5. Proper Use of Time
There is time for everything, time for planting and time for harvest, time for crying and time for joy, time for death and time for birth, time for war and time for peace, time for love and time for hate.
To be successful in life we should understand the proper use of time, and how to influence it, because time is life..
Most single men or women are able to manage there time more effectively, because most of them know where they ought to be at any given time, they know the amount of time they spend chatting or talking with anybody.
When you are in a relationship especially unhealthy ones, you won’t understand the essence of time, or time management, because most time you are seen calling, cursing or texting or on a date with your lover.
Most times many get lost and would spend every hour of there day, trying to cheer up and be in sync with there lover, especially when the other part is not employed and wishes to be over pampered and drama filled, if both part are not employed this would be a disaster, and that is why many are seen jobless, because the pleasure felt in connecting, chatting, romancing, kissing, making love takes away the time of the individuals to think and aspire to get better.
Time is money and those that want to be a billionaire or millionaire manages there time well, either by being single or
in a healthy relationship which helps and motivates them to excel.
Been in the right relationship can make you grow exceedingly and been in the wrong one will delay you.
Pray before you choose a partner, do your home work properly before you accept him or her.
Been single and celibate is not wrong but helps in building a brighter and prosperous future, even though most cold nights would be hard to get through, waking up most morning with sperm on your
boxers or pant or bed, and most of the time you will become sexually starved or sexually frustrated.
Seeing couples and wishing you could share in the delight, but the truthis bitter and waiting for the right woman or man is better than sharing a future with the wrong soul for the rest of your life.
Some are living in bondage because of the kind of woman or man they are in a relationship with, being in a healthy relationship is not wrong as along as you are matured enough, and have a good management skill on how to excel and never misplace your priorities.
Know what to do at the right time, healthy relationship is a blessing, two can withstand what is meant to destroy one.
Healthy relationship brings #prosperity, #love, #peace, #joy, #favor, bright future and helps both parties get through anything because both are meant for each other but it seems really hard to find this kind of relationship, that is why its
important to spend more alone time understanding your self, your weakness, your good and bad and to be sure you are ready to start something before jumping into it…..
The one you should look out for is a toxic relationship, nothing good will ever come out of it, its one million times better to be single, than to be in a toxic relationship because it has claimed the life of many, destroyed many destiny or future and left many in a road of no return.
Be inspired, pray and hope for the best.